When Jane first bumps into Peter at the begining, you used the word "see" twice, and I think that it would sound better if the second usage was changed to "spot" or something.

The last sentance was worded a little awkwardly. At first I thought you meant that August wasn't the one kissing her, and then I wondered what Peter had to do with anything. After reading it through a couple of times, I understood what you meant.

This was so beautiful. I love these short stories of yours. They could easily be developed into something bigger, but they are much better on their own. Excellent, excellent job.

Wow. This was good. It was wonderful, well written, and then at the last second, the whole thing fell apart. Good job, and update soon!

I KNEW IT! The red hair and the red peony was just too much of a coincidence. Nice job, as always.

Very cute :) I've gone into a bit of a fiction funk since I finished reading what's currently posted of Solitaire (from your point of view, that should be a good thing ;) ), and I just didn't have the heart to start another heavy story, so when I stumbled upon these short ones, it was just really perfect.

Anyways, I really liked this. It's just cute, and I can't think of anything else to describe it. Very feel good - you've done an excellent job.

Good job, Renee! Another wonderful short story! I need to take a short story class from you, lol.
Right now I'm supposed to write a descriptive paper about myself that's 200 words! I know, it'd going to be tough. It's supposed to prepare me for writing acceptance letters to colleges.

Bravo! Bravo! What did your teacher give you on it?

Oh wow. That was really, really good, Renee! So well-written! And I know a few people who need to read this for themselves.

Oh! I'm so mad! What a little snot! Actually, that's pretty much your average girl, isn't it? I'm always afraid something like that will happen to me when I go to a guy's birthday party! Ok, so I've only been to two. But still! Good job describing all of the feelings! I could totally relate to that.

I say, what an amazing idea! I like this little, "13 Stories" thing! Can't you just see it all, years from now, when you're a famous auther? You'll have all of your big, famous novels and then everyone will buy this collection of short stories by you and have them on their shelves to read to their kids at night! (the older kids, I think)

Oh, and just because I have no idea when I'll be able to reply to that e-mail (my life is a bit hectick at the moment), I'll answer one of your questions now. Yes, Evan does have a myspace. If you look in the list of my friends, I think he's on the bottom of the first page somewhere and his name is WIZZ PANTS (you know, because his last name is Wisenant). Yes, he has an awsome Beatles background and all of these coolio Beatles quizes that make me like him more, but then he also has all of these weird friends that leave the most brainless comments and then really turns me off a bit. I didn't know he hung out with people like that!

Great shor story, however familiar it was, lol!

Oh, wow...I'm really confused. Isn't this the part in The Voyage of the St. James Sisters where Gail and Nathaniel talk? And after I finished reading it I went to read reviews, but I ended up on the first page of Peter, and I can't find a story called Thirteen Stories.

Maybe it's just my computer playing tricks on me. I hope you update soon!~Jessica

very clever,i enjoyed it very much. go the scarf turban, i did that at school once and got in trouble because i was being racist pfft teachers are silly somethimes really.. but yea any way i really liked it.

That was so cute! I absolutely loved it! Yes, you MUST submit it in this year's magazine! It's so good! I've never tried to write a short story either. Maybe I should some time. Not right now, though. My head is throbbing with a head ache!! I hate it.

Good job!

oh my word i loved it...my only thing was that you used the word 'rather' a lot...and i found myself counting the number of times you wrote it instead actually reading the story...that's my only complaint and other than that i LOVED this!! i hope you write more...you're quite talented..