| Reviews for Cave In |
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Justin Carlton 3/8/06 . chapter 4Whew - I finally got around to reading this. Sorry it took me. The chapter was solid, although Belanna's anger is very, very childish. I thought she simply got annoyed with Evan because he was a pervert? The only other thing I found was when you said it was utter black in the cave - which is correct - but in the next sentence, you say Belanna glanced at her watch. She wouldn't be able to see it unless it had the backglow thingie... I suppose that's implied. Anyway, good writing, and I hope you'll keep it up! |
NOLONGERPOSTING 2/18/06 . chapter 4it may not be finished yet...but you managed to let us know that you are still alive and breathing! Update soon...oh, if you are just going to replace this chapter, could you email me at ? |
TaurusGirl7 2/18/06 . chapter 4update soon! |
Justin Carlton 11/9/05 . chapter 1I finally got around to finishing Chapter 2 - I know you told me about its completion a few days ago. It looks good and is shaping up nicely. Keep going at it. (I had to 'review' your prologue because it wouldn't let me 'review' chapter 2 - I had already complemented you before... Weird internet server.) |
Justin Carlton 10/5/05 . chapter 3It's shaping up nicely, Jen. Keep it coming! |
NOLONGERPOSTING 10/3/05 . chapter 3It's good, great detail, but Belanna's reaction seems to be a little hasty. I think there needs to be a little progression in her anger not just on and off. Other than that, I love it! |
Justin Carlton 10/1/05 . chapter 2Hey... It's good - no surprise there! The only thing I would change is (however strangely) the summary - it kind of gives away the title. That's not a criticism - I just like to keep my summaries from giving away anything in the story - so people feel obligated to read it. I don't know about that Evans character - he sounds like a pervert (to an extent) to me... LOL |
NOLONGERPOSTING 10/1/05 . chapter 1I really love this story. I can't wait to read more. I hope that you write quickly! |
NOLONGERPOSTING 9/28/05 . chapter 2I can't wait to read more! It's a bit short for me to really make a critique, but I'll get to it eventually when you've written more, but so far so good! |
Serendipity Pierce-Clarke 9/27/05 . chapter 1o. Definitly write more. looks like it's shaping up nicely. |