|Reviews for White|
| Newspaper Print 12/30/05 . chapter 3
Grawr. Update soon! I love it! Very interesting... are demons really on the loose, or did more then one mirror fall on his head?
-'Ferever a fan, Newspaper Print
| lesseninglessons 11/10/05 . chapter 2
I love the atmosphere in this chapter. It's so ... dream-like! The scene with the butler was fairly chilling, but your writing seems a little rushed at times.
The sentence "I abandoned the idea, and my ideas began to scan the room for some other way to get out of the room" should obviously be "I abandoned the idea, and my eyes began to scan the room for some other way to get out". There's a few other mistakes and jarring formulations like that one, so I'd advise you to go through your work and polish it off before uploading.
But despite small flaws, this is definitely one of the more gripping stories around here. I shall await the next chapter.
| lesseninglessons 10/3/05 . chapter 1
I absolutely love your writing style. Nathaniel's narrative is quirky and unstable to say the least, but he remains an interesting, likeable character. That's proof of talented writing - to be able to make a mentally ill character likeable. And even though we've had very little description of them, "they" are already pretty great villains - both menacing and mysterious. I'm very curious as to where this story's going. Keep writing!