Wonderful emotion, but it did seem to end abruptly. I agree with the rest of the reviews, add more! Maybe at least one that rhymes with the 3rd line? (hugs)

Much Love,

*K's Moonshadow*

i too felt that it waz " " thiz much from being completely finished but it still iz really good, nice work

last two lines are powerful, possibly due to the 'imperfect rhyme', really more of a reminiscience of rhyme.

nice effect, great work

I felt it was unfinished. I'd add a last line with the same metre as the third. Keep at it

-simpleton