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| Queen of the Jazzed 2005-10-23 ch 6, | That made me smile.=) And hot. Beautifully written, although you are missing a few conjunctions in some of the sentences. xD |
| Walter Dash 2005-10-19 ch 5, | I really like it. Please continue. |
| Cel M. 2005-10-14 ch 4, | Dude...I love this story so far! PLEASE UPDATE SOON!...ahh need more! |
| amomentsangel 2005-10-12 ch 1, | Hi ok here goes I like it's m/m enough said, but I would sugest when someone different is talking make a new paragrapg because when you put everyone talking in the same paragraph it gets confusing. Besides that it was good and will need work, but I can't wait to read more. Oh and try not to go to fast it's hard to understand the situation unless you slow down, but not to much so that your story becomes boring. Don't take this as being mean no I like the story and want to read more, I just wanted to say this. Keep writing though. ^.^ |