very well written essay... the way you placed the song inbetween ur opionions makes it all the more intresting and moving...

as well as ur opinions well... your exspecting to much... we are humans, based on instinct and until the day that changes we will allways be facing these problems... as for america we are doing the best we can possible do, and if u feel different go to these "third world" countries and compare until then ur opinion is well... no backed up by anything other than the word of others inwhich is bias...

other than that you essay is very well written and you do have talent..

Enjoyed It

this is really well written, but it is not only america that's gone down teh tubes. it's humanity

Have you actually done any research on this or is this simply a collection of thoughts you've pieced together from what you hear from friends, the media, and left wing idealogues?

That's what I thought. Maybe next time, stop to learn some facts.

First off, the poor have not been "left to fend for themselves." What do you call millions in social security and welfare? What do you call public education for christsake?(I'm not saying the education system is equitable or in good shape, I'm simply pointing out, if the rich didn't care about the poor, would their tax dollars go towards funding public ed?) The top 5 percent of taxpayers pay 50 percent of taxes, is that what you call "abandoning the poor?"

http://w w w .taxfoundation.org/news/show/746.html

Our cities are safer than they have ever been, violent crime across the country has plummeted thanks to the repealment of many "liberal" social programs and laws and the reinstatement of common sense ideas.

Our newspapers, even though statistics show nationwide violent crime falling, report MORE crime than ever before because that is what sells news.

Another thing you decry, the prisons that "shut off people from the world" has helped lower instances of violent crime, as the creation of prisons has coincided with the decrease in crime.

Also, how is the "blood of thousands" on our hands? Is it on your hands? I know it's not on my hands, I never killed those people. Your problem is you try to attribute unearned guilt to the entire portion of successful society. "What right have you" you say, "to live happily while others suffer?"

I'll tell you what right, the right of my own life, to live it as I see fit, as long as I don't infringe on the rights of others. I ask nothing more than that my rights, to keep my own property, and to enjoy the fruit of my own hard work, be left alone.

Also, you confuse the original intentions of the forefathers. They never wanted us to be equal in anything but rights, since equality of position, even if some are smarter, or work harder than others, means wholesale theivery and anti-life (as in Communism).

"...our cities are death traps, holes of poverty comparable to those of the third-world countries we claim to 'save.'”

yeah, except they're not. comparing a homeless person in new york city to a homeless person in, say, calcutta, is insulting to the person from india. the crippled individual in calcutta, who has absolutely NO access to plumbing and other basic amenities, is at a completely different level of poverty than a homeless/poverty stricken person in the u.s. both people need help, but acting like the levels of poverty are the same is ridiculous.

"Each step our children take toward our American utopia is a step closer to our own destruction."

anyone looking for a "utopia" anywhere is bound to be pretty disappointed.

"This is our American dream. It is every man for himself, and he who doesn’t have enough luck is lazy and unworthy of our sympathy."

do you believe the government should have even more of a role in taking care of the people, or that people should willingly help their neighbors?

i liked the structure of this essay (song lyrics, major point, song lyrics, etc.) but you make way too many broad, sweeping statements that border on being incorrect.

This is a very powerful piece. I love the idea of encorporating a song into your essay (and one that fits very well, too).

What you're saying is true for the most part, but maybe a little exaggerated. At the end, as you grow hopeful, it might be nice to include an example of a person who actually overcame social barriers, just to lighten it up even more.

Keep up the good work.