|Reviews for elpis defloration|
| Nobody-n-Particular 12/16/05 . chapter 1
| L.M. Fraser 11/6/05 . chapter 1
Hmm, not bad.
I've a couple of spelling nitpicks, which I hope you won't mind - gnawing, not knawing, and slimy, not slimey.
Your punctuation is interesting, but seems in places a little senseless - not particularly consistant or following any real pattern of emphasis. Ditto some of the language you use, particularly with the larger words.
Very interesting and well-felt, though. Nice structure too. Good job.
| evm 11/3/05 . chapter 1
i love all of the mythology, (though i must admit i need to refresh myself a bit, some of it was lost on me) and the clash of two different sets of beliefs- the greek and the christian. amidst all of this were your perfectly lovely words- it reads like a steady stream of water. i loved 'she probes the technicolor/northernlights unraveling/ pandora's (mystery) with/ fingertips streaming/screaming/(for) light' best.
| simpleplan13 11/3/05 . chapter 1
i love the ending.. awesome poem
| Astarayl 10/30/05 . chapter 1
Amazing. I absolutely loved this. Not only is your style incredible, but your word choice and imagery is just so powerful.
The beginning few stanzas were a really good lead-in to the piece.. admittedly, at first glance it seemed somewhat random.. but as the piece grew the meaning fell into place.
There's no criticism I can make.. no criticisms. It's perfect the way it is.. strong, and I love how it builds.. good work.
| mizu no kokoro 10/25/05 . chapter 1
wow... speechless at this intense poem awesome work
| Poe DeLasVegas 10/23/05 . chapter 1
Once again, it is messy, but perhaps that is simply what you enjoy doing.
It seems as though you used "big words" to try and bamboozle the reader into thinking the poem was good.
I'm not saying it's bad, but it's definately not the best piece of work I've ever seen.
| poetic abortion 10/23/05 . chapter 1
honsetly, I can't think of anything to say that hasn't already.
| AboveTheSalt 10/23/05 . chapter 1
this might be one of my new favorites of your work. it is truly stunning. favorites.
| lackluster 10/23/05 . chapter 1
it has a certain flow to it, i adore the wording. ((you confuse me. you amaze me.)):i'm lost for words.
| The Red Queen04 10/23/05 . chapter 1
I really admire your use of language. (I am well acquainted with Modernism.) Yet I find myself at a lost in trying to figure out what exactly it is you are trying to accomplish, particularly with your use of parentheses. Feel free to contact me and explain it.
| lacking motivation 10/22/05 . chapter 1
super crazy but totally hip. nice formating style.
| HauntedMisery 10/22/05 . chapter 1
This is amazing, great work!
| GypsyMothra 10/22/05 . chapter 1
Some wonderful imagery once again. It flows nicely.