Reviews for The Elven Chronicles

Reviews For: The Elven Chronicles - Reviews: Page 1 of 12

Mosaic Stains 2008-07-09 ch 7,	abuseCool name for a warrior-- Bladslinger-- that is. I swear I've either heard or read it before, but I can't remember where. Oh, well... The chapter itself was good, short compared to your usual length, but good much. It also was pretty a filler. That's bette than nothing though. As usual, you know how I like your fighting scenes. When it comes to other things within the chapter, there were a few minor mistakes, mostly within the conversations. Which reminds me, what do you mean by 'very real sense'? Like here:- {“But he's impartial as well in a very real sense.} I've heard of real talk but I doubt what you mean and that means are the same thing. As for developing Illandil... I really don't have any suggestions or comments, he seems to be coming out good to me. Characters need to be developed slowly to come out just right, like you know, so you're doing just fine. Especially if you're going to explain his past alot better later on. ~M.Stains
Nicola Guills 2008-07-06 ch 7,	abuseHmm...I liked the action in this chapter, adding believable action to my stories is something I was never really able to do so I give you props. :) I think it really propelled the story forward! ~nicola~
Nicola Guills 2008-07-05 ch 6,	abuseHA! This chapter was funny. It was hilarious picturing Gailen being attacked by his sister. lol. Anway I liked this chapter alot. One thing though, there was alot of modern slang, I don't know what time period this is supposed to be but should they be saying things like "pal" and "moronic idiot"? Other than that. I like it. ;) ~nicola~
Nicola Guills 2008-07-05 ch 3,	abuseKinda short wasn't it? And I was hunkering down for a nice long descriptive read too... Anyway! This story reminds me of Eragon in the way that fantastic creatures are just sort of the regular norm instead of just legend...(that make sense?). One thing that stuck out like a sore thumb though, “Alright, pal, I guess I’ll have to stay for the night since its rather late now. Maybe you can arrange a place to spend the night for me. I won’t really mind what you have to offer.” "pal?" um, shouldn't they be saying something like "Bretheren," or "kind traveler" or "Wise friend," or something like that? Just a thought, and, Laryx don’t have to wait long before breakfast was served on a platter with bread, eggs and bacon. I think you meant, "dosen't". Besides that, I love the dialect. I could never do dialect in my own stories which makes my dialouge sound kinda stiff and boring...anyway picturing the people talk is very enjoyable for me because they way they talk has so much personality in it. ;) This is a nice reading experience. ;) ~nicola~
Nicola Guills 2008-07-05 ch 1,	abuseI liked this. It sorta...reminded me of Eragon (some people are offended when I say this, but don't be, it's a compliment seeing as how a devote 2 days of my life to reading each new 'Eragon' book that comes out...:) Ahem, I'm getting the vibe that this "Circles of Arven" is your main priority so...do you want me to finish reading this one or move on to that one? Either way, I like your writing style and I probably, eventually, get through them both. ;) (if ya don't mind) ~nicola~
Outlaw02 Extreme 2008-07-05 ch 7,	abuseHeya, and finally, I'm back! Anyway, the short summary in the beginning really helped a lot on refreshing of what had occurred in the previous chapters, and resuming from there is all right. Though, it is best not to do that often. At best, you could try dedicating yourself to release a chapter at least once a month, or if longer, once in two months. That timeframe would at least be enough for other readers to come back, and enjoy the prose.All right, enough of my blabbering, and onto the review. Very much I can say, the battle scenes are well thought out, though I did spot that some areas were a little vague in some way. And unfortunately, there was one sentence I could not figure out. 'The kick hit it's target where Faynor wanted with the resultant force throwing off Illandil's momentum as his knee joint suffered the crucial hit.' Yeah, you might need to explain to me a bit further on that part, that's all. Other than that part I pointed out, it is the same old prose I read in the previous chapters. :D Somehow, it seems that you may have followed some of my footsteps in sexual humour a bit there. XD So, yeah, keep it up, and I will try to get my arse into reviewing your new prose. I'll see how it goes. :D Outlaw-2 Extreme
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 7,	abuseSo a Bladesinger is an Elven Warrior. Can't wait to see more of them in this fiction. BSP X
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 6,	abuseThis chapter was amusing! Gave me a very good laugh. I could actually see Gailen getting ganged up on by the elven maidens! Thanks for a great chapter. BSP X
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 5,	abuseThanks for the history you provided about the Elven Races. It was very interesting to read. BSP X
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 4,	abuseLove the mythical creatures you have put in here. Are the Tree Folk based on the ones that appear in LOTR? Still, avery good chapter. BSP XX
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 3,	abuseA Messenger, sounds very mysterious. Just how I like fantasy to be. Brilliant stuff. BSP X OOps: just realized in the last review, I used the initials of my penname XD
BlazingStarPhoenix 2008-06-18 ch 2,	abuseAbsolutely lovely, all of it. Since this story has elves, magic and other such fanstatical things in it, I love it!^^ SPM XX
Spirit Tigress 2008-06-14 ch 4,	abuseLooks like I owe you some reviews. Very interesting...
Spirit Tigress 2008-06-10 ch 3,	abuseFiller or not, it was still good. Sorry I couldn't get to you yesterday; things have been happening. I like the way you don't have everyone speaking the same way; it makes the story feel more...real.
Teffie 2008-06-07 ch 3,	abuseSuch a short chapter! :( The plot seems to be moving along nicely, though. I would suggest adding a tad more description. "After putting his stuff near the bed" "Stuff" sounds kind of modern. I would change that. "Laryx woke up at that point of time." This sounds a little awkward and just...boring. Maybe you could say, "With a jolt, Laryx's eyes flew open." Something a little more descriptive. And now the journey begins! Can't wait to read more!

Return to Top