go cheryl its yer b-day lol j/k n-e-wayz LUV IT !bwahahahahahaha ... cough splutter...ah im good now byez willoe

I don't want to make it sound like this poem sucked (because it honestly didn't), but you could do a lot better than this if you wanted to. I guess if you're not trying to win money through poetry competitions then you're okay with the style that you have right now. But it would be cool to see what a poem written by you would look like if it's not about cutting/death/all the other over-used topics that teenagers write about. If you only write poetry to vent though, then keep doing what you're doing cause it's excellent.

I won't try telling you what you can improve since you don't really seem to care, but you seem to have a lot more potential in you than what's in this poem. I'm not saying that your writing is bad in anyway, I'm just saying that it could be better.

Keep writing in the free world.

Deep, and well-detailed; keep up the good work.

Much love,Juliet.