"nobody rescues you if you die in a corner,and nobody punishes the bigots." excellent lines, the metaphors are deep, gives me stuff to think about. some really good stuff in here.

liked your promised land poem btw, i realise i hit send before i said that, d'oh

i think in the last few stanzas, in between the "REPEAT!", you really established the tone of the poem. the end REALLy brings it all together, but i think that your poetic language before the repeat part happens lacks a bit of focus. the whole "oops" concept and the lover concept comes across as...not quite as mature as the rest of the poem is. the term "making out", and "oops" doesnt seem to fit in to the whole thing. i'd say try to establish that lover concept, but in the sense that you leave it in the end: a solid rock, yet youre still agitated. solidify, more, the concept and presentation of the lover, maybe not using so much literal contact, but as a symbol, perhaps, yet a real human at the same time, and your relation to it. then i think this poem could really go somewhere. also, i dont QUITE understand what you mean with the whole "repeat" concept. i think if you reflect and realise exactly what you want out of this poem, you can give it a good edit or so, and astound us all.

this piece is held together in a nice, although somewhat fragile way.. loved the subtlety of repeating "i become agitated" and also the vivid details in lines like " the cacanophy solidifies from molten glass to crash all around me"...do keep writing