Mer... It makes my mind swoosh into a totaly different place, partly because of the collection of words, another because i don't understand it fully. I get misshappened figures dancing around whenever i read your poems and it sets me in such a mood swing, could be hyper to tranquile, like right now.

wonderful poem. XD

the most unsoppy lone poem i have ever read. if i could hug you, i would... soppiness sucks! this is cool! love the jazz ananlogy it's so apt. the internal rhymes carry well, it's a great piece.

top job. that's ace.

i think that if you end the poem at "half. heaven. holy. **." it is beautiful that way. after that, you kind of ramble a bit uselessly, continuing to another very related concept, but not fulfilling it. it's not necessary, i dont think. it's witty that way, if you end it right there. hey, do you want me to show some of your poetry to my friend jonathan? he'd give some rad advice. if you do, do some of these edits ive suggested, find your best stuff, and send it all in an attachment to me, and i'll print it out and give it to him. if not, coo, whatev.