so gorgeous and painful. makes my heart ache. i love the middle of the first stanza. and the middle stanza too. and mostly all of it.

you write with amazing eloquence and beauty.

xoxo

this makes me want to collaborate with another writer sometime, it's something i've never done. i can't say i'm a really big fan of playing with punctuation, and i personally found it a little distracting, but the images in this are perfectly ghoulish. a good poem to have written on halloween.

very vivid. love the title. thx for sharing.

frighteningly beautiful

you can't expect worthiness to follow those killer cataclysmically shockingly excellent first lines, but you manage. every word perfect.

a very awkward format, but i believe that you make it work...

your words are beautiful yet sting like a razor.

Reading this was like eating ice in the snow.

Amazing.

I can dig. Loved the bit in the first stanza, '... tease of a swan'

On the whole, a nice piece.

wow this is such a wicked idea. really sinister idea, the dream...it almost creeps my out. just ownderful poem though

Wow... so much there it's almost hard to take it all in. Beautiful job, both of you.

o, so prettyful, i absolutely adore the second part, adore it, and the ending was presented in such a way i found to be dragging, pulling at my stomach just enough to force me move closer to the screen but not to actually rip it out, nostalgic (sp?1) in a subdued sort of way, muchly love this, excellent job

once again, this is truely great work.i like it because i can compare my problems job.

Interesting... I love your manipulation of type to stress certain points, it really adds to the poem. "my halloween-eyes girl bleeds a keliodoscope kamikaze from her tongue" was my favorite line. I've never heard anything like it.

Wow, I've been dead for a while, ne? Ah well, beautiful poem(s) even if they are dark. Still, dark poetry can be oh-so-lovely...