DAMN...

Really powerful! It would be a remarkable opening to a story.

yeah, to me, its almost like its missing something. But I do like it. If it wasn't meant for a oneshot, I'd say it has potential and lots of it.

-J

I really like this because it is so far away from that "girl waits by phone for guy to call" scene. It's darker, intense, raw and more hollow. The reader can sense the inbetween emotions. I think that you can do a lot more with this though. It would be interesting to see if the character finally snapped and what would happen if she did. Anywho, I liked it. =)

=] loved it. simple as that. raw emotion and fully rounded. yayza. good luck with your future works~
~windy =)

wow

That was great! Really good one-shot.

Wow...that was intense! It is awesome as a one-shot, but it makes me want to see how things play out. Anywho, great job!

I call it brilliance, though most would call it "a tad graphic". I've wanted o read - or write - a piece like this for a while. I'm just ecstatic I found one so well written.

((You're in my Favourites.))

Ah, I know girls like this. I use to be one. I love how you showed the emotions in this work. Great job! =)

Brilliant.

Good job Autumn:Dyou should't be dissapointed or doubt your ability to write. It is amazing how you put your thoughts and feelings into words that mean so much when people like myself could only dream of writing stories as you do.

...wow...that was great...though sucks for her! i liked a lot!

You really shouldn't cut yourself short so often. This piece was just as amazing as the rest of your work, and, as always, puts my own work to shame. It completely boggles my mind how you manage to fit such raw emotion into such short pieces. No plot? Are you kidding me? This thing had 'plot' oozing out the sides! I almost wish you'd continue it so I could see what happens next. As for meaning... I think every girl at one time or another can relate to wanting someone no matter how badly they treat them. Whether it be a boyfriend, family member, or even a good friend. Everyone craves acceptance and love; sometimes even looking for it in the wrong place, as your character was.

I really loved this line:

"He was like a disease she could never be rid of, a sensual, sexy plague that tormented her, haunting her thoughts, her daydreams."

Beautiful description. Have I mentioned how much I love your writing style? Because I do. I hope to God you're planning on writing professionaly, if you're not already. Fantastic job... as always. :o)