So, today I finally had time to sit down adn read some fo you things and when I was reading this I thought it would make a great first chapter to a romance book. Now I doubt you like these books much but I love them.. So I just wanted to encourage you to continue with this one because I believe you could write a really good book from this chapter.

i checked and it also seemed done but i messed up the last one so tell me if there was another chapter will ya? that said it was an excellent short story, the exlanation of her feelings was wounderful and heart felt, and i particualrly enjoyed the paragraph on the tree, this is not to say the story is beyond reproach. the fact that the paragraph were short i dont fell is important but some feel almost unfinnished, the third paragraph for example, perhaps it is just my imagination, feels as though there should be little somthing more to it then what there is. other then that, i think that this is a wounderful short story.

This is quite good. The setting is excellently done. The cookies cooling is a nice touch. There are a couple of places where the phrasing is a little redundant, but otherwise I can't find anything wrong with it.

Hi Nicole

I tryed the cut and paste thing again, it worked.Don't know why I kept comming up with the "page notavailable" thing before but anyways...

The story is a good one. Your discription of thesituation always makes the story come alive in mymind. Words and ideas flow naturally, not jumpingaround , making it easy to fallow.

I cant really comment on the punchuation orspelling lol. Im sure you know why! Rather thosethings are something I can feel and sence when I read, and yours seems fine.

You never fail to suprise me with your knowlegeabout the human condition ( stuff of life ). So muchinsight for such a young woman! Your a very good storywriter Nik... Keep up the good work! Love Dad.