   brightlily 2008-05-03 . chapter 4that was amazingly beautiful.
in such a tragic way.
but i love it all the same. |
 dark*stars*grace 2006-02-28 . chapter 1 such a great poem, it sounds like it could be a classic rock song. nicely done. |
 emmathree 2006-02-28 . chapter 1This is... to say the least, disturbing. Which any of my friends will gladly tell you is a sign of pure genius. |
 no.peace.los.angeles 2006-02-18 . chapter 4I like the specifics of which star it was. That is cool. But once again, the suicide thing...Keep writing! :) |
| no.peace.los.angeles 2006-02-18 . chapter 3 Ooh, not a big fan of the second stanza of this one. It was going well, then you brought up suicide. Yikes. That's always a risky move. But. Keep writing! :) |
| no.peace.los.angeles 2006-02-18 . chapter 2 You bring in such random ideas, like the ice caps, but it works! That rules! I love your writing! Keep writing! :) |
| no.peace.los.angeles 2006-02-18 . chapter 1 WHOA! That was awesome! I loved it, so sexual and just yummy. Fantastic! Keep writing! :) |
 bread and circuses 2006-02-16 . chapter 4Holy mackerel, ahh, wow, good golly, gee-whiz, take your pick 'cause they're all running through my mind. Some are R-rated versions, but still.
This? AMAZING. The peter pan chapter itself was brilliance defined but the continuation is godlike. I worship your mind for this. |
 you're so postmodern 2006-02-07 . chapter 1So deep, I love ur metaphors or the way u compare him! Very cooL! I will check out some more of ur work laterz but now g2g, Nona |
 simpleplan13 2006-01-20 . chapter 4wow... sad and beautiful play on the peter pan thing... i hafta say in the last chapter i thought it was wendy who committed suicide, but im easily confused |
| simpleplan13 2006-01-20 . chapter 3 wow.. such a happy beginning and a sad ending.. im not sure i like it... i feel like they should be separate chapters.. i kinda want more of the happiness & more about the child, but that's just me |
| simpleplan13 2006-01-20 . chapter 2 i love that last line... it kinda summed up all the fears you said she had... nice descrptions... kinda funny somewhat sad... nice job |
| simpleplan13 2006-01-20 . chapter 1 i like this... very cool.. the descriptions are great... i love that second line and the glow in the dark part.. awesome |
 Faerie Energy 2006-01-09 . chapter 4Wonderful!!
I love it! Great work. Very well written.
All due respect,Faerie Energy |
 Sarah-Brighteyes 2006-01-01 . chapter 4So very sad...I wish I couldnt cry sometimes.
I loved this part though. You follow the imagination of peter pan through it. I think you should write a short story about this. Just a suggestion. Take the poem and create something longer... though it wouldnt make the piece any better, just a compliment is all.
Very good writing. I am glad you have some new things up. Makes me excited to come back to fictionpress. Bravo Dear citrus as always. |
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