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| betalight 2007-04-12 ch 1, | abuseAh, I really like this poem. It's very powerful. I like how you separated and silly me from the rest. A deep sentiment I feel most people share at some level or another. |
| beti213 2006-03-20 ch 1, | abuse"if I had you I could learn to have myself, too." wow. where do you get this stuff? this piece is perfect from beginning to end. I adore it :) |
| Jacqueline Stem 2006-03-16 ch 1, | abuseOh my goodness. Amazing. |
| not sure yet 2006-03-02 ch 1, | abuseso pretty and human, there's a lot of strength to your writing in this one, i muchly enjoyed this, excellent job |
| emmathree 2006-02-28 ch 1, | abuseOnly one word:Powerful. |
| the naked civil servant 2006-02-20 ch 1, | abusejesus christ. favourites. i'm not even going to bother to explain why. YOU ARE SUCH A GENIUS IT HURTS |
| no.peace.los.angeles 2006-02-18 ch 1, | abuseWow, that is just incredibly heartbreaking. Gorgeous, though. And in a simple way. You don't say a lot, but the feeling comes through very clearly. Great job! Keep writing! :) |
| delete account asap 2006-02-16 ch 1, | abuseIt's wonderfull, really heartfelt, I can jsut imagine that I'm her lying on the floor. Great! |
| lipgloss-and-blacktears 2006-01-24 ch 1, | abuseWow! This is great. I love the imagery throught the poem (especially the first stanza). I love the theme and the emotions brought up, I know them all too well. Well done! |
| simpleplan13 2006-01-21 ch 1, | abuseinteresting ending.. nicely done |
| acrobia 2006-01-19 ch 1, | abuseWow...the way you use images in this poem is amaizing - the brick wall, the way you describe the goosebumps is really invoking, as well as the other decriptions that you give the character's body - the "secret slices of my eyelids" for example, it's a wonderful descriptions. I also really liked the way you keep using the word "me" or "my", as if the character is trying to vindicate herself but can't - its a strong piece, made stronger by the hidden images and tone. Keep up the good work!xo - Acrobia |
| Jezsh 2006-01-13 ch 1, | abuseI was really moved by this...I think it's something a lot of people can relate to, expressed in a gentle, longing and beautiful way. |
| Galadh Niniel 2006-01-13 ch 1, | abuseAbsolutely beautiful and so true. If we are accepted and loved by others we can accept and love ourselves more easily, whoch can be agood thing but also a bad one, if that love is withdrawn again from others etc. I love the subtle undertones in this poem, for instance how in the description of the way the speaker perceives herself in the first stanza you have si undertones or imagery that shows that the speaker has a negative or ambivalent attitude towards herself (if i have read it correctly), such as "everyblade of goosebump hair" - that is such an excellent image. Great poem. |
| re x invented 2006-01-11 ch 1, | abusei like this. it's vague, but it gets a lot across. wonderful work. x3 |
| sloppy firsts 2006-01-05 ch 1, | abusesounds like one of those times where you just lie on your bed (or floor) staring at the ceiling asking yourself one of those big 'life' questions and then feeling awfully depressed because you can't find an answer. very thought provoking. slices really caught my attention. happi new year! *pops open the wine* s2 chaos |