I like the front part, the imagery was pretty good, and so was the idea but what's with the... inverted exclamation marks and "heS2rt"? I'm not really a fan of "creative writing" (literal meaning), so yea... I'd much rather prefer just plain words. Other than that, it flows rather well.

Beautiful...very fresh writing - not too deep but still passionate. Keep writing.

pretty pictures. nice poetry, too :)

I like this a lot! Has a very breathless feel to it. Beautiful.