DAMN.

witty dialogue?
check.
smooth flow and correct use of grammar?
check.
complicated romance that fully takes advantage of the nerd-cheerleader cliche without overdoing it?
check.
diverse characters? (ahaha, i'm asian)
check.

fictionpress obviously has legends-you know the ones i'm talking about. the don't-disturb-me-until-i'm-done stories that hardly make you feel guilty about pushing off your thesis or finals logs. this little treasure, i can say with certain absoluteness, is one of them.

the problems that ensue with my finding of these rare gems, is that i am turned off by any other fiction piece that lacks the sarcastic (yet subtly so), funny, and rounded characters with the refreshing punch of amazing lines that stories such as yours provide. (this is me telling you in a roundabout, complaining sort of manner that i really, really want to chain you to a typewriter so that you can write 24/7.)

hey, despite the frank personality, manipulative mind, and paranoia patrick possesses, i'm starting to wish that there are more sexy nerds like him in my academic setting.

your writing had my eyes glued to the screen. keep up the updates-i'm hoping my "tiny" review speeds up the process a bit-and don't leave too much of a cliffhanger on the next one:)

I've been around a ton of guy programmers all of my life and this is probably the only story on this site that accurately portrays them!

I never understood that weird geek cliche people have going. I've never seen it in real life. Some of the best programmers I know are party boys.

D: You haven't posted in over a year T_T

A year and two months. A YEAR AND TWO FREAKING MONTHS! UPDATE OR I SWEAR I WILL FIND YOU AND CASTRATE YOU! (doesn't matter if you have iron balls- I have a pretty heavy duty chain saw [:)

EXCELLENT begining XD

haha, I'm guessing a lot of your new readers have come across this story from their countless friend's favourite lists or the SKOW awards... and I am no different :)

One of the things that I like about this story is probably your main character. His personality quirks such as his wit, brains, sarcasm, verbal sparring expertise, perspective, flaws and the ability to nearly always have a decent comeback to every situation (a trait I wish I had :( ) had drawn me and I'm sure others as well. Reading his words and seeing things happen through his eyes is quite a unique experience (I'm tempted to use the word "refreshing" haha:)
And your plot doesn't disappoint either; reading through your action and dialogue is like watching a mesmerising game, which is hopefully the right effect you wanted.
I would normally ramble on about your other characters in excruciating detail but it's past one on a school night, with my finals coming up (I live on the other side of the world, where our school's different).
Anyway, I have really enjoyed reading this story for the past hours.
*looks at the last updated date*
Over a year and a half?
I'm desperately counting on your girlfriend, Myrika, Kendal and your muse:)
I really feel for your original readers who were with you since the beginning, oh how torturous waiting so long can be, you leaving us hanging off a cliff. Literally. (I guess they didn't call them cliffhangers without a reason :P)
I absolutely can't wait for the futures chapters to come!

I finally have been able to properly read this story, and I think Patricik is the most well rounded character I've read about in a long time. The dude is cool. :)

um...yeah...me again. i don't know how likely this is to happen, but if you update, could you e-mail me? sorry if this is coming really arrogant or something,i swear to god i don't mean it that way. i tried to get an account on here but there were a lot of...complications...anyways, heres my e-mail account if it's not too much:

bo! this story isn't finished! i've decided to hold a grudge against you and my sister (the muffin nut told me it was completed!), argh, god knows if my curiosity will ever be sated! god damn it! if ever take over the world you better watch out!

um...okay, i'm not even sure if you're reading this cause i really didn't look to see if you even still GET on this site, but i had a huge urge to review this story, so i'mo gonna indulge in myself.
first of all, I LOVE THIS STORY! i'm not even kidding. you know those i heart new york t-shirts they have? i'd probably buy one of those shirts if 'new york' was replaced by the title of this story. i'm really glad i found this story, i love the concept of mind games (and conspiracy and the underground world, and...well just stories where the protagonist is intelligent in general) but haven't been able to find any...in stores or otherwise. i had pretty much stopped getting on fictionpress after jd allen, myrika, and all the other good authors got off due to plagiarism, the only reason i even read this story is because my sister reccomended it, the reason i KEPT reading was your-patrick's '**' comment.

...that had me cracking up as well as all his other comments :). so anyways, i'm glad you're writing stories and hope that you will continue to (or not...ur choice...but then again maybe you ARE still writing which would make this completely...pointless), hopefully you wrote other stories so i can finally read something good enough to hold my interest. so, i'm gonna stop writing now, a third because i sincerely doubt anyone wants to read a review this long (especially since you already got so many ._.'), a third because i'm getting hand cramps, and a third because i wanna finish this gosh dang (ugh, these substitute words just don't have the same impact as the original do!). so...yeah okay...i'm just gonna read the last however many chapters now...bye (dang it! why are ending reviews so god-gosh dang akward!?!?!?)

I just wanna say - I love your story! =)

**! Sorry, don’t mind m’ French, but seriously, I tend to filter all incomplete stories out because I miss the vital element of patience hence my lack of interest when I have to wait. I am still unsure how, but your story managed to slip the radar. Being the unobservant person I am I began reading this story on Saturday and didn’t notice the lack of the ‘complete’ label marked on all the stories I usually read until I got to the end last night. So now I have to add you to my alert list. You should be honoured.
Now, to the actual story. It’s bloody good. Patrick reminds me of someone; although I’m certain if I ever chose to mention it to this someone he would disagree tell me I was more like him. Not true. I’m just a tad bitter.
So you’re a twenty three year old bloke with a degree in computer science, writing a romance novel on a website mainly orientated with the female species? And people think I’m an interesting specimen. The names and places on your profile mean nothing to me holed up in little old Britain, never planning to move, but you’ve obviously got a life outside this website. Have you always written romance? Its intrigues me as I was brought up pretty much as a boy, it was only until much later, when circumstances forced me to accept my gender did I ever consider coming out of my narrow vision of fantasy and mystery and experiment with other genres. And I hated it. It took me much longer to actually enjoy romance, although even now the word ‘love’ has no meaning in my life. And never will.
Many people think it’s because I was considered one of the boys for much of my life, but I beg to differ. I have siblings who were brought up as ‘girls’ yet have the same indifference to either gender. Actually that’s not true…alright, the opposite gender. So I began to attempt my first romance…not the best of my writing.
So what made you choose to write romance over pretty much any other genre? I mean I’m certain it can’t be easy being in the minority of men writing in this genre, you must have had your fair share of snarky remarks. Especially if you began this in high school. I mean only one person I know personally knows about my story and even her, I would prefer to dispose of, just so its easier to know, whoever’s out there, they don’t know me, so whatever they think doesn’t matter. Cowards way, but do I care?
I’d enjoy reading a reply, even though most of this was me going on a tangent. I read your profile, it’d be nice if you updated soon, or you’re likely to never hear from me again.
You have officially received the longest review I have ever submitted. Again, you should be honoured.

I've just spent about two days madly flipping through all your chapters, and I've gotta say, I LOVE all of your characters, especially Patrick, despite, well, his name. His character is so sarcastic and manipulative and so single-minded that it's impossible to not have an opinion about him. I guess that's what's so good - all your characters envoke a definite reaction, there's no in between for any of them, it's either love or hate, and that is an amazing thing to pull off. :D Anyway, update soon!

jeeze that is just wow

This is fully like the romance cliche, but a complete switch of the genders.

Reminds me of the matchmaker, but you know, all mutated up and such. Emma = Patrick, Darien = Marielle if you can see that comparison. Just assuming you've gone any where near that story.

I'm liking the vocab though. "vury niize, how much?."

Au revoir.