This is incredibly tragic and sad. I think my favorite image is the snow falling. Very clear visual. Keep writing! :)

i like the way you have repeated the third line of each verse - its unusual, but it really works. great job! :D

Natalie, once again a very nice piece of writing. I especially like the repition of "My love for you was discarded.." and the last verse referring to the 10 commandments was very clever and deep. Loved it, keep up the great work. Luv ya! Cheers.

This was simply beautiful. The way you described how your love was thrown away, so brutally, was deep and sorrowful. Your descriptions between the lines were really amazing, and the emotions could be felt within the words. Good job.

nice emo... very well done and powerful .I've been in that situation beefore. It sucks i know. but yeah... good work, on a nice piece.