oh, I loved this. It reminded me of a song, especially the way it ended. good job getting the jittery impatient feeling going.

I had serious doubts about this poem when I began to read it. I mean, you'll probably agree with me here, it's such a trivial subject on which to write an entire poem: a phone call. But you definitely have something special here. Usually, I'll rip things apart that don't have a meter (and you DO NOT have a meter), but for some reason I think it works in this piece. You write like a person would think: in emotional fragments. And your last line, "Relief"--that was nice. It incorporated a closure that most angsty free-verse poems lack these days.

I didn't love this poem because I thought it was very sad and structureless. But I did LIKE this poem because your idea was breathtakingly original--your style was also original--and you've somehow managed to separate yourself from the other angsty, free-versers out there in the world. Overall, I think this was a good poem.

Nice job.