I like it... love the repition at the end... nice message too

it has a rather catchy beat to it... hm... good work

keep writing!

love the beginning, but i'm not so sure about the ending...i think that needs a little work. cuz at the beginning it's like there's a rhyme scheme starting but it sort of evapourates after one or two lines. otherwise, great job! i love the hurrying sorta pace throughout and the repetition at the end just emphasises the point. keep writing,

mez

interesting. that would be kinda cool to set to music. but what type of music? let me know. ttyl. -hugs- *TI*

Nice, I wanted to write something like this but I couldn't do it without making it sound really corny. I'm so glad you did a better job than I did.

Hey, Shazaam, you should make that into music! That would be great! It would be awesome! Maybe I could help you... MAYBE, lol Nice one, like it lots! GO SHAZAAM!