this is great. i love how detailed you are and i can see you meant the last line to be strong and it is. you should be very proud of this one.

Tension much? This is great. It shows the thoughts running through not just a swimmer's, but any athletes head before the big moment incredibly clearly. Nice work. I'll be watching for more from you.

ah not signed in. anyways i like it. thanks for all the reviews!

Thank you for your kind words in your reviews! I really liked your wording, and how real this was. Once in a while your timing seemed a little off, but that could've been on purpose. Keep up the good work!

You capture the tension perfectly - thoughts racing faster than the body could ever manage - up to the very end where those last five lines (6, 6, 5, 5, and 8 syllables) grow shorter, like shallow breaths before the dive and the splash. You can almost hear the water in the s of "immersed" and the dulling of all above-surface sounds in all the n's and m's. Beautiful. ) (P.S. And thanks for the review!)

Oh, nice! I like this one. The vivid images compliment the tense excitement of the race.

"And I am immersed in water." Awesome! Keep up the awesome stuff!

Thanks for the review! I really like the Silver Saline Anthology . . . Thanks bunches for your kind comments!

May inpsiration never leave you wanting!

all my love,felicia

Nice poem...kept me interested the whole time! Nice job.

Brandon

Awesome poem! I know exactly how it feels! (I used to swim competitively too!) You describe the feelings to well and this is written so smartly! I love it! It sends my heart racing! Great job!

oh, that was cool. good formatting. you could really see this one. good job.