innocence...

love it.
this was written BEAUTIFULLY.

i would love opinions from a talented writer like yourself on my work. it would mean a lot to me!

Such a simple, innocent moment. Lovely.

Reminds me of these days my siblings and we would cross between two subdivision, ours and another, and walk around empty ball fields on hot summer days. We'd walk to 7-Eleven or the swimming pool...and then a lady put up a fence on the government land. All we crushed was a mess of ivy. The neighboor on the other side of the street was influenced too, and put up a sign asking us not to cross. The fence was high. I just don't get why the world stomps on kid's care-free days. It's just the differences in two worlds that suddenly clash. Collide. Nice poem. Keep writing.

Great use of imagery. If I had to complain I'd have to choose something petty like capitalizing your i's. But no complaints here.

nostalgia, definatly. for me at least.

but it has that old feel of heavy bikes and happy children.

Very nice; peaceful, yet sweet.

THe description is beautiful, the whoel thing is really good. Nice work!

that's incredibly beautiful and nostalgic. your words are woven like a memory - flashes of color and momentary recollections strung together in a glimpse of a forgone time. ha, your words inspired my review to be vaguely poetic. way to go.

this reminds me of the beatles. why? i want to read more of you but i'm afraid i'd feel my own poetry is worthless.

could feel this, amazingly written.

Lovely ending.

Vivid. I loved the imagery!

"spindly trees against a skeleton cloud sky"

*shudder* Beautifully written. Amazing.

the imagery is gorgeous. beyond beautiful. "a skeleton cloud sky" is my favorite.

love the format, the style; the poem is just asoso lovely & i just neatly faint each and every time i read the lines. it.is.beautiful.

~* noelle