There seem to be a great load of cliches in this piece that could easily be weeded out if some effort was taken. And the repitition, while it adds something, I don't think you need to have 'hide away' in there as many times as you put it in.
You have nice visual words, if you would only put them to good use. Maybe just let loose a little?
-J.A.
Courtesy of the review marathon (link on profile).

hmm I really like this! it has a relentless sort of rhythm and it’s tinged with a note of desperation. good work!

it's nice..

your piece convey lots of meaning for me.

we..

you gave some inspiration to work on something...

*wink*

Why is it that it hurts more to stay than to fade? You words are always so powerful.

EB

nice imagery. I think the earth is a sign of revitalization instead of rotting substances, though. If i could only figure out from which portion this poem came from, your brain or your heart? I got a few new poems if you want to see.

i think that would make a very good song, with a sad lilting melody and a beautiful woman's voice singing it... good job!

meh..no offence but I didn't like this one--sorry =[

nice! I like the repitition. good job!