I couldn't finish reading the first chapter, I have OCD about grammar, capitalization and punctuation. This is not a blog or an IM conversation, it's a fiction story, so make it presentable. I'll tell you what you need to make it more decent, you need it to flow more. Something English teachers say often: "A good author doesn't TELL what happens, (s)he SHOWS what happens." And slow it down a bit more... I like the idea, even if I don't particularly like how you're writing it.;)servatis a pereculum, servatis a maleficum

i know what it is you are not letting it flow it is like you are just trying to hard to make it happen

Aww, Liam... =[[

Poor him. Poor Renee. Poor everyone! Lol, great story. Keep it up!

it is still rely good but i do not know it is mising some thing i do not know what it is thow so for give me i rely like it thow

Awesome chapter! Are we going to see what happens at the party? I hope so! =]]

IT IS STILL RELLY GOOD I RELY LIKE IT

This is still a really great story. And this is really weird, lol. One of the songs I'll be performing to soon is "Living on a Prayer", and it was stuck in my head and I had just gotten it out when I read that part, lol. Creepy, lol.

Anyways, this is really great! Keep writing and please update soon!!

kaydanse

Aww, I'm no legend. =]]

But thanks!

You're the author! Grr, you need the thanks not me! =]]

Good job, I liked it. Tee hee, I never thought about it being Renee with the radio. I forgot about those little apartments at first, so I was like "She has an apartment?" Tee hee...

Update soon!

I read your intro...how the heck can you wake up dead? You don't wake up at all!

thanks for the update it is a grate story

Tee hee.

Awesome chapter. =]]

Update soon, like real soon!

Lol. Um, thanks! =]] My real name is Camrie.

Yeah, anyway, great chapter! I can't wait till you update!

Tee hee.

No more sadness. Well, that's good, kind of.

Lol. Great story =]]

Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for reveiwing on my story.

This is a really interesting idea...I haven't really read anything like it, keep it up!

Kasie

Lol. Thanks!

This chapter was pretty good, not so sad! =]]

Anyway, great job, and I can't wait to read more!