BRILLIANT! I loved this piece. And you say you can't write anymore?!

This piece was made up of the thoughts of the guy and without it, it would've fallen apart. Again, it's confusing as we know that the protagonist shot the right guy, but we have no idea how he came to be shot in the legs. A mysterious third party perhaps? Did the victim spin around and get a few shots in? Did the odd bullet richochet? TOO MANY CHOICES! Too many questions...that will never be answered, but that's the beauty of it.

I smell Quentin Tarentino here - and that's a good thing. Confusing, yet gripping. Keep up the brilliant work.

I like it. I love the POV, and the constantly switching thought track. It really went well with him thinking about not being able to hold his thoughts. Mostly I just really love this POV - third person, but with a first person view. It's good, and as always, the ending leaves you wanting more. Damnit.

Original fiction, particularly one shots liike these, it seems, is your strong point. Keep it up!