alright, changing your name is fine. i changed my name like 3 times. might have even been 4. but yeah.

i was going to say that i thought the story was veering off the main plot a bit; like, the reason terry went to that school where he met lee in the first place. but then he got the SM necklace, and im like 'oh, okay, thats fine, i guess' but please, dont go off track too much. it seems like you didnt have a plan for this story, and if you did, its kind of weird, i think, because it just, as ive said a thousand times already, gone off track. terry has a problem, and it hasnt been addressed since i dont know when. what happened to the little girl he kept seeing? has she found a new buddy or something? i dont know what youre planning for the sequel; obviously, theres more to the story than just this, otherwise there really wouldnt be a sequel. so all this might be in there. i wouldnt know, though. im not the author. that would be you, miss. so, i could be wasting your time as your already planning all this in your sequel, or i might not. if im not, then i suggest you revise a bit, and see what you can do. im sorry if any of this sounded a little harsh or anything; i didnt mean it to sound that way, of course. im just trying to help.

spelling and grammar were okay in this chapter. there were some places you could go back and fix, because they are there, but it wasnt too bad. as always, the cute factor with the two main characters was awesome. it just made it even better with terry's brother there, asking him about lee. plus aure is extremely cute, too. :) and yes, you must definitely fit in a mistletoe scene. an intense-but-not-TOO-intense mistletwo scene. maybe in the spirit of christmas, there could be mistletoe in the ice skating rink, or wherever else theyre going? just a thought. haha, can you tell i really want the mistletoe? of course, you dont have to put it in. im just weird with romance stories. this is no exception, unfortunately for you, lol.

well, keep on writing, and update soon --Ss.

I always review a story that I like. And yeah...the chapter was really good. Keep up the good work!

Wow this is a great story you did really well and added it to get update when you go further. Not just saying this cause you are my neice but you did a wonderful job it is mostly a story to make you smile and the dialogue between the people is very real.
hugs
Aunt Vickie

scared here!

sequel?! -ears perk up like a squirrel's- wait, do squirrels' ears perk? well, replace 'squirrel' with 'dog' as a default, just in case. um, anyways, i was a little confused in this chapter. i didnt get what exactly happened with her dad and her sister. maybe we're not supposed to, but... and the cuteness was still good. i meean there was that kiss at the end, right? two year olds are cute in stories. my experience with two year olds in real life have proven to me that theyre little tyrants. oh, well. could you at least sneak in a misteltoe?? heehee thatd be awesome. and sorry its taken so long to review this-- if it explains much, im sitting here, practising the Order of Operations for math, and talking to my cousin online. multitasking so i can get myself time to read all things piled in my email account thats been updated...

keep on writing and definitely go with the sequel. --Ss.

r

Aw...sad...keep up the good work!

ah, i was getting tired of the old name. -shrug- well, anyways, 'twas another sweet chapter. i wonder, does terry's mom know that lee is his girlfriend? i dont remember if anyones ever mentioned that. but the bracelet was a rather (there i go, using my 'dignified' voice, right after reading harry potter, lol) nice idea. okay, not nice, awesome. but anyways, my goodness, terry and lee are perfect together. and terrys just so darn cute, lol. alright, well lets hope 'soon-ish' is a little long. or at least hope that the chapters until the very end are filled with nothing but sugar for those two. i am a romantic. a very hopeless one, and yeah. anyways...

keep on writing --ss

Aww...that was cute. I love the bouncy things! They are so much fun to play in! That was really cool that Lee's father showed up. Even though he was a ghost. That was really wonderufl. Keep up the great work!

im sorry for not getting here sooner --with summer vacation just starting 6 days ago, i did nothing for almost three days but reading on fictionpress, and with all the reviewing and whatnot, my fingers started hurting. so i was banned from the laptop for a week, and im technically not supposed to be on here right now, but oh well.

anyhow, yea, this chapter may not have been sugar high, but i guess you could easily compare this to a kitkat bar. yea. anyways, well, what with the reason i told you up there, i have to cut this short. im sorry!! but update soon, okay??

keep on writing ~~MWR-:|:-

I love your story! It is so cool! I like the plot and the charaters! Keep up the good work!

I really love the first few lines. I think that's an excellent place to start, and you definitely have a good idea here. It seems a bit rushed, though. It meaning the chapter. Maybe if you fleshed out some details it might run more smoothly?

Also, the lines "Tomorrow would be so much fun. Can’t you just here how excited I am about it?" didn't seem to quite fit with the mood of it. If you elaborated a bit more, they might not seem so out-of-place.

Excellent job!

hey don't feel like that it's never as bad as you think it is i actually thought it was quite good enjoyed reading it so i'm eagerly awaiting next update... ~spider~

oh, dont read the strongest heart lives. im not going to continue that one, so just dont even bother. but because its so popular, you could read the little white book, although my favorite is a story the silver wind tells (no ones reading that, telling by reviews, now), and aastha is more sad and serious. so, yea.

well, this chapter was still a little sweet. next chapters gotta be sugar high!! please and thankyou, of course, lol. we're finally finding out more about her past... telling frm the way shes always acted, you wouldnt have thought something like that couldve happened to her. its really sad, and i feel bad for her. but shes got terry. i like terry, hes really cool, and hes definitely different than most of the guys in my own school, lol.

anyways, all i remember of a spelling error i found was a 'to' that should have been 'too', in the very first paragraph, very last sentence-- "his features seemed to(o) kind" it was. other than that, spelling was fine, and so was sentence structure and grammar. detail wasnt so sweet, but like i said -- next chapters gotta be sugar high!! :)

keep on writing, and please get that next chapter written soon so you can update. ~~M.W. Renaee-:|:-

ps -- oh, wait, i forgot; so i was right when i guessed 'serenity' awesome!! lol. okay, question: i always spell 'awesome' with an 'e'. does it have an 'e' or am i spelling it wrong??

hello! i'm sorry i missed your last chapter and i'm late for this one but i don't know i've just been in the thick of things lately they were really good though arrgh don't do that leaving me hanging with this mysterious photo you're cruel clever but cruel lol your story gets better with every chapter you know anyway see ya about ~spider~