I agree that the format demonstrated in your piece is fresh and creative however, are the punctuations used through out the piece necessary? It's your poetic license of course to include them but, from my perspective I don't think they add to the quality of the writing. I look forward to reading more of your work.

Top marks for descriptiveness.

I really like the way you write, i'll come back and review more of your studff when i'm not drunk.

Alan.

wow. the images are so violent, one right after another...beautiful.

amazing!!

Intresting format!

Rock Out!

i love the format. its just beautiful! and lovely imagery. nice job!