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| darkgurl92 2008-10-04 ch 4,   | omg..another great fic...update soon |
| NO LONGER USING 2006-07-22 ch 4, | I haven't checked on this story for the longest time and I come back and find an update!? Yays. Anyways, I liked this chapter and idk I didn't see any 'mistakes' in this chapter, but maybe you could add a tad bit of detail to help the flow, other than that perfect. I loved it. update soon, Lacee |
| FlameMaster 2006-06-16 ch 4, | I'm liking the conflict and turn of events with this story. It's what draws readers in and keeps them interested. There are no actual 'mistakes' in this story, but there are a few things you need to consider. I may sound repetitive, but here's my opinion: Though dialogue in necessary to keep a story moving forward, an excessive amount tends to rush it. You've managed to brush by with mostly dialogue, so hats off to you, but descriptions are also an important part to round and smooth the whole thing out... but not too much. Your current approach is fast and an easy read, but a little too harsh. |
| Jasperlin 2006-06-10 ch 4, | hey. an update--i did not see this at all!good chapter! i likes. best chapter yet, in fact. keep writing-update soon, please! |
| Amazonian Pwincess 2006-06-08 ch 4, | thers no mistakes. werz the rest?? |
| Sincerely S 2006-06-08 ch 1, | This is a really good story! Alice sounds cute and nice. The guys in her life make it confusing and exciting so can't wait to keep reading. Ruby sounds like a great friend! Good job on coming up with the creativity of this story! |
| Jarthur 2006-06-07 ch 4, | I liked the dialogue in this chapter. You should add some more description. But it's very catchy and keeps people reading! Update soon. |
| . .Lulian. . 2006-06-07 ch 4, | heh... this is cute.. =) veery cute... i like it... =D |
| Winter Flurry 2006-04-02 ch 3, | lol...hell no...sorry, but I can just here this really annoying girl I know saying that...she says it wa-a-ay too often! Nice chappie, I really like it. Don't think I found anything to criticize, but then again, I could have forgotten because I was too caught up reading... -Slipping Fears |
| NO LONGER USING 2006-03-19 ch 3, | lol...love the ending with the letter...Sean seems so sweet to Alison...lol...anyways update soon ~~Lacy~~ |
| NO LONGER USING 2006-03-19 ch 2, | this was another great chapter...love the conflict going on between this girl and those around her...this Vincent guy sounds like a real jerk and the other guy Michael seemed sort of sweet... ~~Lacy~~ |
| NO LONGER USING 2006-03-19 ch 1, | great chapter intro ~~Lacy~~ off to read more |
| Cel M. 2006-03-15 ch 3, | Wonderful new chapter, as always. Thank you very very much for reviewing my poem, you kick **. And thank you so much for the compliment and don't worry lol, I'll be posting up some new poetry soon. PLEASE update soon. I can't wait for more! - Celie |
| Jasperlin 2006-03-15 ch 2, | AHh, since i can't review twice in one chapter... yeah..so I just wanted to ask one question... i don't understand why Vincent is being mean to Alice... did i miss something or is he just mean because he's mean or something?Also, who exactly is David. What's his relationship to Alice and Sean. oh, and was sean asking her out ? or...not? yeah thanks |
| Jasperlin 2006-03-15 ch 3, | Hi! This is a great story so far. Very interesting though.Wow, a lot happened in this chapter... please update soon. -jasperlin |