 Seeker of the Way 2006-02-21 . chapter 1This is very evocative! One way to try to defeat our fears is to name them, if you name it, you have power over, so say some of man's oldest "magic spells" (Adam got to name all the plants and animals and what not).You use some nice interior rhymes and rhymes from line to line, I like the look of the word falling actually falling, and the g as part of the next line, giong into the sheets. You also have some pretty good metaphors/similies here to try to describe the indescrible here. This is your writing gift, for you experience things so differently from the rest of us.Is this for a grade? Good luck!Don't be so ** yourself, your poetry is NOT utter crap, just wait till you put it to your own music, you'll see!~ John TrueP.S. You know you can use my poetry as song lyrics as long as you give me proper credit/royalties. =p |