M, I love the 4th stanza, with pushing knives through bones and orgasms tasting like infinity. That is awesome. Keep writing! :)

i like the comment on the shallowness of this life ... the suicide/masochism connections are really cool

hey , i'm really glad you're back . your writing . this was amazing , as always . the format seems different , i really like it . i especially love the last part of this , although all of it was brilliant : 'tell me/now that i'm bloodstained/does my voice make you go/masochistic?' fucking awesome . keep writing .

... the enxt time life gives me a commercial bread...

awesome line. I really liked this.

Interrupting the worst times / with the best lines

that is probably one of the best lines i've read in a long time. short and sweet, yet spiked with resentment. beautiful work.

((tell me,now that I’m bloodstained,does my voice make you gomasochistic?))

That's totally my favorite part of this poem. You are just so good! I love the imagery you conjure up; I'm insanely jealous! Keep on writing!

Very powerful imagry, effect and affect. I loved it. My favorite line would have to be "he'll smoke his cigarettes and wish he could cry;," it really spoke to me.

Thanx for writing, dearie.

The second (counting the single line as a stanza here..) and third stanzas are by far the best. The sort-of rhyme between cry, times, and lines adds something else to it... and that stand-alone line is, in itself, fantastic.

I will say, though, that I don't think the ending is quite up to par with the rest of the poem. The rest is fabulous, and the last stanza is only good.

I like this. Quite a nice job.

oh...that was...uglybeautiful in the true sense of the word. perfection at it's most imperfect. i love it.