 Quaviver 2006-02-22 . chapter 1God, I love this poem! I feel it should be in a picture book in full, glossy color. The antlered man, black-laced dragons, unicorns with diamond hooves, Peter Pan, and Arthur...I saw the whole history of fantasy pass before my eyes close enough to touch and inhale. Your imagery is just so evocatively, enchantingly, magically fantastic.
A little nitpick. There are some parts where the tone and mood becomes somewhat modern. It's not too noticeable, but it does impede the flow a bit. An example is the word "cause". That's a contraction of the word "because," and for me, personally, it's a little slang-y. Maybe you could use the word "for" instead? Just a small suggestion.
Anyway, lots of adoration for this poem. And I love Raistlin Majere too, by the way.
Love, Quavi |