Yay! You finally wrote chapter three! And this IS a good chapter! It was hard for me to figure out who's point of view was who's, at first, but I eventually figured it out, I think. :D

Anyway, I'm intrigued at this new girl. Will she be a major character, or a character with some sort of role? Write write write write! I wanna know! ^o^

Wow, Kale's pretty! But I think that if Loen didn't sound like a creepy old man who had been smoking so much, he might be pretty, too. Depending on how he looks... that is... is he pretty? Make them both pretty, please? :D

This is very interesting. I definitely like how Fia is kinda showin' more not-hostility towards Kale, now. ^.^ I like Kale.

Well it certainly kept my attention! I'd love to know more about these characters and the world they live in, so yes, definately carry on with it if you have the enthusiasm!

- gold against the soul

I think this is a good story, a very good start, but there's a lot of rambling, I noticed. A lot of it. Maybe, if you ever decide to edit this chapter again, cut a little of it out? I don't know :P Sometimes, it takes me a few catches to realize what you're getting at.

But I think Kale and Fia's history is very interesting, and I would really like to know more about it! Please write a second chapter! :D :D :D