Hisa! I luv You!

haha, ohk, here i am. now that i'm awake, heh, i can review properly. i like how you left his wounds- the fact that he has open wrist cuts (esp. bloodless) is slightly sick. i mean, that would be gross, being able to peer inside your body like that. anyhow.

i love how he ends up in an ugly city. you contradict yourself in the second paragraph, though. you say he's in a metropolis, but then you say the city was smaller than a major city would have been.

also.. remember, whenever you switch speakers, you should always start a new paragraph. ryan & mr. azrael's conversations would be a lot easier to read if you broke them up.

& o. i can't wait to meet the boy he has to watch. & it's interesting.. his gift, that is. i wonder what effects it'll have on the story.

well, it's uh.. 1:30 in the morning & i'm a little intoxicated, hah, so i'm reviewing to remind myself to read this tomorrow, haha. ohk! the summary kinda drew me in, i'm interested in things like this.. iono. anyhow.

kisses!

Ack. You can't just leave it there!

So far, your writing is absolutely amazing. Everything is just painfully...concise. I understood every tidbit of imagry and could see the pictures in my head as if it were second nature.

Please give this story a second chance? I really really REALLY want to see where you were planning on taking it.

Tsk , tsk... THat's waht happens when you commit suicide... But hell, even I've tried once. Everyone has... But keep it up.. I like it so far. Putting you on author alert.

I'm intrigued...

Hey, Lover Boy. This is a good start for your story, a little short, but a good start no the less.LUV,Bone