You know you don't accept anonymous reviews, right?

Wow. That's really sad. I sorta want to know more about the narrator. I want to know why he kept himself locked up in the room, why he was with his uncle and aunt... Wow, there's a great story behind him, that lowered his self-esteem far enough so that this girl could hurt him so much. It definitely reminds me to always be caring to those I talk to (as Erin tried to be polite, but ended up hurting him).

Not a lot I can say about this, except some positives... The blank-faced narrator made him both us and everyone else at the same time, depending on who we are in that story (the narrator or the girl). I like that anonymity, and it's dangerous at times (sometimes it doesn't work. It does here.).

And it is so true: vanity, vanity, all is vanity.

Good job, Chris Conway. ~Shadow

I liked this. It was sad, but very good. Well written; slightly obsessive. You didn't really explain how he first saw her, but it was a short story, so you didn't need to... if you were to update, I would explain it. If you do update, let me know! It's good.

** beautiful. i am still trying to make my thoughts catch up. wow. empowering, enlighting, rapturing - can't think of anything else.

~kait

Even though I'm not a fan of using song titles as story titles, this is an interesting piece. It was pretty easy to read, although I would suggest a bit of editing on some of the lines, if you're still working on it.

I think what you had the best mastery of is your description of setting- you a cinematographer or something? ;)