I really like it. A lot. The imagery was amazing, and you made perfect use of the same question (would it be okay...?) without it sounding too repetitive. I think the length is perfect, too. If it was shorter, it wouldn't have seemed so heartfelt, and if it were longer, it would have seemed to have dragged on. I love your writing, as always.

Wow. Very touching. It really makes me want to cry. Beautiful.