hah, your writing is cool. you never know what to expect. me like mucho.

Gorgeous.

"femme fatale cigarettes / in my noir world"

That last line; oh so perfect.

wow. .. i really like this. the style of it, the style of your writing in general: i love it. it's awesome. it's so interesting, one of those things you just love to read. ... awesome.

Okay, you've been nice to me but don't expect a soft side (I'm too tired to really praise the hell outta you anyway). I did enjoy this a lot, but a few things...

the intro minus capital letters failed to annoy me like it often does, which is a good thing. The only word I realy would hate if this were my poem (but it's not so I have no right, maybe dislike but not truly hate.) is that SARCASTICALLY. It has the effect of blinding obviousness, maybe that's what you were going for but you also achieve it by using bold earlier with the (we) thing. I prefer that to be honest. Don't mind me, I'm funny with my capital letters.

Besides that, I loved the use of "noir," very classy/sassy. Nice work, thanks for your critique.