I really enjoyed the poem, personally, I think the line "In smallest mouse, in strongest bear," is fine without definite articles, and has a nice contrast.

This is truely extraordinary. I believe you have put somehing forward in this piece that is far beyond the average stabs at artistic design given by most teenager. It is simply beautiul.

On a note of more direct commentary... I am not entirely sure if you meant love or hope in this piece. I think instead that it may be meant as something far deeper. Hence 'it has no shape, it has no name'. It tends to make me believe that there is some driving force more majestic than anything that man could put into the confines of semantics. That indeed there is some purpose for living that exists indipendently to all of our sorrow and despair. I dare say that this piece is almost spiritual.

For the rhyme and meter, I would say that lines would occasionly do with the extra word. 'Once the dew glistens -on- fields of grain.' 'In -the- smallest mouse, in -the- strongest bear.' 'And lift e'ery man -to- highest aim.'

Still, any suggestion of this last type must be taken with a grain of saltMuch of poetry lay in the spoken word. Many lines that critics becry as being out of sync, are simply being read wrong. That is why recitals are so amazing. It is the only time that you can see a piece presented exactly how it is seen by another.

Returning from that long side track however... You should definitey continue writing. Talent like yours is a rare gift.

May Everything Be Perpetually Copacetic,The First Knight of Jane.

I love your poetry...always so profound! Ok all the reviewers seem to wonder if they got it...i think that perhaps getting it is a perosnal thing and that the nameless may be different for different people? Well I think it is hope or love. The first four lines are my favorite, I love the visual of when the sun shines down with mirth. Persanal prefernece, i think it flows better with, in THE smallest mouse, in THE smallest bear. But regardless, I loved it.

Your gift for forging a concept into poetic verse astonds me. I never could do it. (except once ;D) I normally don't reveiw poetry because I always feel like such a neanderthal and like the other blonde that also commented I worry if I really 'got it' sometimes. However; in this case I believe I did.

Nice poem. I admit I probably dont quite understand it, but then again, I'm pretty blonde, so that doesnt mean anything, lol. I like your choice of words. Nicely done.

Keep writing

~Rhia