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| Tawny Owl 2008-04-25 ch 1,   | When I read it out loud it really sounded like you meant it. I like the rhyming scheme/repetition at the end of the lines. It makes it flow, and makes up for the fact that all the stanzas are all different lengths. I liked it anyway, and I think personal opinion is the most important thing when it comes to reading poetry. Not that I'm an expert! |
| Harmonic Discord 2008-04-20 ch 1, | I loved your opening - it grabbed me instantly and pulled me in. I really liked lines 2-4 - smooth, cynical, and deliciously wicked :) The rhyme scheme and meter seemed a little off in some spots, which irked me slightly, particularly this line: "I would chase you forever, making your dreams nightmares." It seems kind of long and out of place... Also, I noticed a few grammar errors, such as: Your existence irks me, I know what ill do, -- "I'll" And the word "gonna" seems a little too slang-y for the context of this poem. Overall, however, excellent work :) ~Harmonic Discord from the Review Marathon (link in profile) |
| fatbird33 2008-03-16 ch 1, | nice topic for a nice poem |
| Asherah Seirei 2008-03-05 ch 1, | Wow. How demonic. But demonic in a lyrical way that flows very well. "But of course I'm going to make you relive me again." Haunting, spiteful... I love it. |
| Twilight Starr 2007-10-27 ch 1, | Well written piece. ~Twilight Starr~ |
| tesa131313 2006-12-04 ch 1, | Very strong haunting peice. First two lines for some reason misled me to think that this wasn't going to be that great of a poem but as it goes along it just get's layered with more and more emotion and it becomes a great poem that opens up a huge emotion. |
| Chatterpillar 2006-07-20 ch 1, | i like this. what spurred it? |
| wildinside 2006-06-20 ch 1, | jesus.. this is really good. you have a great vocabulary and your adjectives made it sound like you really did have magic powers. its good...aleX.. |
| Quoven 2006-04-18 ch 1, | I liked it. I like your anger, and I feel the way you think. It's nice to relate to it. |
| Josie Jones 2006-04-18 ch 1, | Intense and thought provoking! Haven't we all been there? You expressed to emotiion perfecty! --Josie-- |
| Shateeria 2006-04-17 ch 1, | Firstly, beautiful and amazingly enchanting title. The poem is amazing and it's beautifully stated in it's own destructive way. haha.. I love it; it's just so...majestic. Selective choice on what character you adore in fairytales..haha.Stunning and sensual. Love,Teera |