Aw, the ending is sweet! I think it would be quite a dark story, but the fact that the grandfather tells it to his grandson takes away the horror I think...I like the last thing he says, lol...and it's definitely creepy when he's talking about the jungle. Good job!

I liked this. I liked this a lot. At the part where he sat up and found it staring through the window, I actually jerked back. You do imagery very well, and I like how you keep the conversation lifelike instead of lapsing into overdescription.

Although I prefer to be a CCer, I can't really think of anything to improve the piece. (Unless 'Jinn' is supposed to be spelled 'djinn', but that might be another country I'm thinking of.) Keep it up--you've got talent here.