Impressive story.
It does draw the reader in.

Erratic at sense, but extremely provocative. Well, not ina sensual sense, anyway... a bit scary, really. You really captured the fear in that story using very familiar figures in society. Great work! Keep up the emotional photgraphy.

Aww.

Well written but a bit too graphic. I'm from Great Britain and I don't see what relevance this has to the situation in the country at this time. It makes me wonder what is going on in your head.