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| Nocturnal Darkness 2007-05-13 ch 1,  | abuseNo reviews?! A traversty of justice, tis what it is! Greetings, it's the mysterious Jay from MySpace, here to review because I feel like it. Hopefully not on obligation, unless you were pointing a gun to my head, which wouldn't really be very nice, would it? Anyway, to the story... It seems like a really interesting start and you've got me interested as to what's going to to happen next, which is an accomplishment. I like the way you write - it's simple enough to explain what's happening yet doesn't feel rushed or empty. We can picture what's happening to the characters in the scenarios you create, and that's always a hallmark of a good writer. The twist of the girl actually being in the Amazon is nice. It'll be interesting to see how this plays out over the course of the story. I can't wait to see what cruelties you plan throw at the amnesiac protagonist. This could make for some seriously entertaining stuff. I can't wait for more. Keep updating and I'll keep reviewing...though hopefully not on obligation...or will I? *Ponders* The only complaint I have - because I have a habit of nit-picking - is that the opener seemed a little short and the paragraphs weren't spaced. Alas, a chapter is only as long as it has to be and we'll blame the site's dodgy formatting for these problems. That aside, I look forward to seeing more of this. Keep up the good work, Rae. ~ Jay from MySpace/Jamie |