Reviews for The Only God on the Windowsill

Reviews For: The Only God on the Windowsill - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

Radyn 2008-06-12 ch 1,	abuseEver read Neil Gaiman's American Gods? There's a chapter in that book that your story reminds me of; it's about a girl named Essie Tregowan and the gods of her childhood. I think you did a capable job in capturing the same surreal, off-beat atmosphere.
merei-chan 2008-05-31 ch 6,	abuseFinally, the end... I really loved the story, and I'll definitely have to keep moving up the ranks to the top. "where the words just stop." I rather like that. It's poignant, to me atleast (since it does seem a little open to interpretation... Or perhaps I'm just looking to deep into thing?). Though, I do agree that there's alot of ideas that could have been explored a bit more, but... I think it was enough to be perfectly enjoyable to read. Lovely. ^^
merei-chan 2008-05-31 ch 4,	abuseAlright, I admit, I lied about not sending you an expansive entourage of reviews... It isn't much beyond I really love the interaction between Kaylee and the cowboy. Words fail me completely on how to describe how I love it. “Well, I could make myself uncomfortable.” It's just enough to be 'carelessly snarky', if that makes any sense. Lovely, lovely stuff.
merei-chan 2008-05-31 ch 1,	abuse(I'm going to make my rounds through your stuff as I'm able...) “I’ll reconnect you in the morning, if you promise to behave” ~ I've done that... alot.. >.> But sadly the clock never does end up behaving at all... That aside, I can really tell the Charles de Lint influences of the story so far, and I rather like it a fair bit. ^^ Of course, perhaps I'll just read through the entire story and review it at the end, that way you don't get a barrage of review-emails, etc...
Inarra Lake 2008-02-03 ch 6,	abuseWow, again, awesome. I wish my writing sounded like this, whimsical in an effortless, matter-of-fact sort of way. :D If I knew, I think I'd want to go out with you. Silly huh?
Disturbly 2007-08-21 ch 1,	abuseHello. As I looked over your profile, this stood out to me right behind "I Do Believe in Faeries". Unable, as I was, to make a decision, I opted to copy the first chapter of each to peruse at my leisure; a tactic I've developed to compensate for my tragic alienation from the Inter-web. I think it will go without saying that, just like "Faeries", I liked this to a degree that doesn't truly connote an encouraging state of mental health. It seems to me that I'll be devoting a good bit of my free time to your body of work in the near future; guess I'll have to read it in the block of time I was going to dedicate to my education, and self-improvement. Que, sera... I won't go through line by line and comment on what I liked; I would never be able to put my keyboard down (it would be the Crazy Glue fiasco all over again). So instead, you're in for the patented Meta-review, scaled down as it may be for the single chapter I've read. So prepare yourself... The first thing that struck me as I read, at least early on, was how strangely familiar this seemed to be. The story begins with a protagonist, who happens to hail from Michigan and struggle against a hostile alarm clock, awakening from their repose to find a supernatural being waiting for them. It does seem as though I've heard that scenario before... Of course, this not only was published well before my own magnum opus, but diverges quickly into a different direction, and, if you'll permit me to say so, is of a completely different (better) caliber. But still, until about ten paragraphs down it was beginning to seem to me as if it were appropriate that the two of us met and fought to the death with swords; there can be Only One! I guess I can chalk it up to the seldom quoted first corollary to the aphorism about great minds thinking alike; namely, that occasionally a mildly stoned headbanger (do people still even use that term?) will concur with the great minds by random chance. I'm doing nothing to suggest how you can improve your skills by commenting on this, of course; I just thought it was cool. While I've said I wouldn't go through line by line pointing out the greatness, I would be remiss if I didn't highlight the really, really good parts. 'Even the crickets were still. They had abandoned their pulpit by the window, deciding to take the gospel of the night to other places'; not to make you blush, but that line was as brilliant as it was concise. '"I’ll reconnect you in the morning, if you promise to behave,” She whispered.'; a lovely glimpse of the quixotic where I'd been least expecting it. '"It’s halfway between the house and the wild. People spend their lives going from one to the other, and never pause in the places in between.”'... Sweet Automatic Jesus; I'm not even sure I possess the articulateness to critique that line, and you wrote it... Why in the name of all that's unholy are you posting this on the Internet gratis, anyway? Pearls. Swine. Preposition meaning the opposite of "behind". You assemble the proverb. As for the characters, I've got to say your archetypical trickster character was superbly done, truly a perfect foil to Kaylee. Note that I don't use the qualifier "archetypical" in the pejorative, to suggest he's some kind of stock character; rather, I only mean to say that it's clear that you've drawn inspiration from myths of such figures as Coyote (as if your profile wasn't a big clue) and Ananzi (only guessing, on that one). And both of them have captured my interest; I'm intrigued to see where this is going. And that story you had him relate- did you make that up, or insert an established piece of Indian folklore into your text? Because I can't tell. It seems like I've went on more than long enough with the opulent praise; So, what can I suggest you do to improve it? Lemme think... If - if - you could work it out so that reading this was a surefire means to cure cancer, provide bigger, longer lasting erections, and guarantee entrance into Paradise after death, THEN it would be better; if only slightly. Short of that, it's basically flawless. Have I started gushing? Certainly, but I'm not just indulging in the sycophantic tripe that turns into the web's largest multi-user circle jerk, either. I really do like this story; and as a certified Hate Based Lifeform, that's saying something. Though I've said it before, I am truly baffled to find a nugget of gold like this amid the cesspool of Stephanie Meyer inspired, Hawthorne Heights driven orgies of angst that 15 year old girls shovel onto this foul website; it's like finding one of Neil Gaiman's finer efforts in the box of Danish porno magazines in my brother's closet. There's a term for what you're doing, posting here; it's known as "slumming". -Disturbly.
Agapantha 2007-04-29 ch 1,	abuseVery good. It has a kind of character about it that i like. I especially like "the gospel of the night" description which you use at the beginning. I also think the technique of going back to a situation or a relationship which has already developed is a good way of starting - it creates a mystery. Mind you i would say that after my stuff. I've only read the first chapter but i shall definitely read more. Ver Good.
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-02-11 ch 2,	abuseWell lookie here! Would you believe who's back on track, and still reviewing? It's me! Tha one and only Awaking kills the Dream. I know you've missed my long and thorough, and not to mention funny reviews...right... ahem 1)"The hands of the living room clock were black and spidery, scuttling around its face." - would you just stop with the spider-references?! Gah, you're making me go all goosebumps all the time...you're so evil, you know that? But apart from that, it's very good imagery. Gives the clock a personality, of sorts. 2)"Kaylee sat down in the middle of the room, feeling the carpet squish beneath her jeans. " - they have a lot of squishy carpets at Kaylee's place, huh? Or maybe the carpet in Kaylee's room squelched...I forgot...XP 3)"Rounding the three, the minute hand made a break for four." - indeed a clock with personality ;) 4)"she walked over to the refrigerator. Magnets and photographs clung to its surface like barnacles, giving it a multi-colored coat. On the handle a post-it was perched, blaring radioactive-pink." - and the refrigerator too :P Ahem, right, so, now I've read this through, and I realise I kinda forgot to comment any more on the chapter, but I rather want to continue reading, than go back up and reread to give you comments. Sorry. But it's a compliment of sorts, I guess...:P Laters
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-23 ch 1,	abuseUnfortunately I got to say that I'm one of those people who don't really appreciate poems, so I might not be reviewing those...but your stories, they're all there for me to give some more unneccessary comments on! And it always look nice with a couple of extra reviews :P 1) I like the title. It kinda reminds me of those children's books that you had when you were little. A teacher at school read his favourite children's book here the other day. It was called The Angel And The Blue Horse. It was really sweet...cough anyway. It's a nice title :) 2)Kaylee- nice name. I like the 'alternative' names that're not so common. 'Thomas woke up, like he does every day. So did John. And Mary too. In fact, everyone woke up this morning as usual, except for Peter, who overslept. Stupid Peter...' Yeah, you see what I mean. 3)"Kaylee woke up, finding herself face to face with the glowing eyes of her alarm clock. 4:36 stared at her in digital." - ugh, digital alarm clocks are tools from hell, I can assure you. 4)"The fabric was warm, like the sheets and the mattress. It wasn’t a sweltering summer night, but it was warmer than Michigan. She burrowed deeper into the pillow, feeling for a cold spot. Nothing." - ugh, the worst kind of nights :S 5)"There was a soft whumph of settling fluff, and then silence. Even the crickets were still. They had abandoned their pulpit by the window, deciding to take the gospel of the night to other places. The quiet roared louder than noise." - and the worst kind of noise too. I feel sorry for Kaylee 6)"She sighed and closed her eyes. Calm. Quiet. The baleful glare of the alarm clock on the back of her neck." - again, ugh. Unpleasant feeling. "With a snort of irritation, she sat up and reached across to her bedside table. The clock watched as her fingers closed over its cord. She glared back, and tugged the black cable from the wall. The light died without protest." - it's a nice touch giving the alarm clock a personality. 7)"I’ll reconnect you in the morning, if you promise to behave,” She whispered." - wow, she even talks to inanimate things - just like I do! akward silence I said too much now, didn't I... Anyways, you should decapitalize 'she whispered'. 8)"“You’re a little old to be talking to things that can’t talk back,” A warm dusty tenor came from the foot of her bed." - I think I'll have to agree. Not that I know how old Kaylee is. Also, see previous note. 9)"Unbidden, one hand shot to the alarm clock. It was solid and heavy." - and heavy, solid objects are reassuring objects to have when strangers appear in your bedroom. 10)"“What are you doing in here?” It came out as a hiss." - ok, maybe he's not a stranger to her...but still... 11)"“I’m not in there. I’m out here. You asked me not to disturb your privacy.” The voice sounded reproachful, like the whine of a dog with an empty bowl." - I still don't know who this is, but I find him quite amusing. Whiny people some times have that effect on me...if they're not too whiny, and I'm not the object for their ranting.:P 12)"He might have been eighteen, or seventeen, or twenty three." - some times it's so difficult to tell, isn't it? I have that problem all the time. Not uncommonly, I miss somebody's age by over 10 years...depending on how old they really are. It's not that easy to see the difference between 50-60 and so on...XP 13)"“What…what are you doing here?” “I’ve got nowhere better to be?”" - sounds like a perfectly good argument to me. I'm often places because I have no better place to be, or do something because I have nothing better to do. Don't you? 14)"“I didn’t think you’d be here when I came back. I thought I imagined you.”" - yeah, well. You should be happy your little imaginary friend is still with you. Mine left me many years ago. Be happy...or else... 15)"“That’s funny. I was beginning to think the same thing.”" - heh, he's funny this guy. 16)"“Honestly, I like sitting on the ledge. It’s halfway between the house and the wild. People spend their lives going from one to the other, and never pause in the places in between.” His eyes smiled. “How much have you forgotten?”" - he seems wise. 17)"“Maybe that’s it, then. You forgot what you forget in order to learn.” “Were conversations with you always this confusing?” “Maybe you forgot a little of that, too.”" - ok, I'm starting to get confused now...To quote the Strangerhood: Nikki: Someone knocked me out. When I woke up a bit later I couldn't remember anything. I had amnesia! Sam: We all have amnesia! Nikki: Yes, but I forgot that I already had it. Suddenly I forgot everything I remembered I had forgotten earlier, and remembered the things I forgot I remembered! Wade: Finally! It all makes sense! XP 18)"“Can you tell me a story?” The man sighed in mock exasperation. “Once upon a time…” “Not that kind of story.” “No? I thought that was the kind you were used to, now.” “That’s the kind I want to write, not the kind I want to hear.”" - I don't quite know what it is, but there's something here in the dialogue between Kaylee and the Cowboy that appeals to me. It seems that they can find back to their old friendship quite easily. It's really nicely done. 19)"I was going along, a long while before ‘once upon a time’ had been invented. How can that be true, when I’m so young and handsome and the story is from so long ago?" - good to see that he has got his confidence all sorted out. 20)"Well, maybe it was a cousin of mine." - XP 21)"Back before there were rules about who could be what and why, everyone was at least a few people." - indeed...at least a few...XP 22)"I told him that there was a treasure buried there, and he could keep some of it if he helped unearth it. All of my selves liked this idea, so we started digging." - :P 23)"“Just like old times,” The man whispered," - decapitalization please. Wow, this is quite a beginning. I'm intrigued. This seems like a rather cute story about a girl who rediscovers her 'inner child', or something along that line, but I guess only continued reading will tell. And believe me, I'm going to find out, by continue reading. Unfortunately it'll have to wait until tomorrow. Or even the day after that. sigh Well, this first chapter is a nice read. Now I'm going to wish for a little man to tell me a story before I go to bed too...XP ~Awaking kills the Dream
J. A. Murray 2006-11-02 ch 6,	abuseWow. Just, wow. This was a really good story. I especially like the dream-but-not feeling of Kaylee's interactions with the cowboy. This was really good. I wish you'd write more like this.
Gathering Crows 2006-10-29 ch 6,	abuseBatman...this was beautiful. It reminded me of a mixture of Charles deLint, and you. I loved this whole thing, the imagery, the characters, how you spin words...it's like a web of stars. If that made any sense whatsoever. LOVE.
The Reader Author 2006-09-05 ch 6,	abuseThis was an interseting story. And I agree with what is said in it. A story should never end. The words should just leave off, left to the imagination of the Reader, or to be picked up again by the Author. In any case, I enjoyed this very much. Respectfully, The Reader & Author
warnthepenguins 2006-06-13 ch 4,	abuse"The crickets outside were silent again. Kaylee wondered briefly if they’d gone to Michigan." How casually heartbreaking! A sterling moment. How many people do you have in that fictionpress cliche-smasher commando squad so far?
warnthepenguins 2006-06-13 ch 2,	abuseP.S. I disagree with 80% of the typographical suggestions of the reviewers below. Sorry guys! I'm just saying! I too am a fan of italicized onomatopoeia, but I am unsettled by all your carpeting squishing and squelching everywhere. Is it made of Jell-O?
warnthepenguins 2006-06-13 ch 1,	abuseDeeply wonderful. Always a pleasure to read something new and good.

Return to Top