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| Jessica Wolfheart 2007-08-02 ch 4, | abuseOnce again, flippin' awesome. Adding to my C2 |
| Naitachal666 2007-04-27 ch 4, anon. | abuseI'm at school, so I can't login. But This is your second story I've read so far, and I am AMAZED. You are a great writer. Everything is perfect. And horrifyingly realistic. ~Nait |
| multiples of six 2006-11-09 ch 4, | abuseWow, that was weird. But it could so totally happen.. to a lesser extent, at least.. hmm. Good story! =) |
| Ilze09 2006-10-29 ch 4, | abuseWow. I'm speechless. That was one of the best stories I have ever read in my entire life. The meek future you have created was amazingly realistic, something that almost feels as though it could happen with the world in it's current situations. Your characters were great, your dialouge was intriguing, and your use of words was unmatched. This was truely a grand story, one that I will remember forever. Bravo. Also, if you could be so kind, could you read and review one of my stories. Preferably 'Espoir' or possibly 'Wrenches in the Gears.' Thanks a lot. Once again, great story... |
| Violet Marx 2006-10-11 ch 4, | abuseWow. I'm kind of suprised that a someone who writes this stuff would actually like and review my poetry. Still, I'm glad you liked it. Also, I just put up another poem. It's the same style as 'no one ever told you no' which you seemed to like, except it has a subject that might appeal to you more. I don't know. Now, focusing on this story, I really like it. I think it could get published. If not as a short story, than perhaps lengthen it and make it a novel. I'd bet you'd get a lot of money off of it. Before you get all mad, what I'm about to say is not a complaint about your cussing. It's merely a statement. I'm just mildly suprised that a ten year old like me would cuss like that. It doesn't happen where I live. Of course, I'm lucky to not live in a trashy neighborhood or go to a bad school. So, yeah, I really shouldn't be talking. Just forget I ever said that. I really like the ending. It kind of made me laugh. "...ask your mother." Hn. That's pretty funny. |
| spydercrystal 2006-09-04 ch 4, | abuseWow. This is completely entertaining in a very sick, twisted way. You are a true artist. I love Arsenic Kisses, too. |
| its not Catie its Cady 2006-07-15 ch 4, | abuseWow, this is really quite an impressive work. I have to admitt that it is a little like "the matrix" or at least the whole idea behind it. I'm a little curious as to how wal mart started to take over the world along with machines. It's very descriptive, I can really picture what's going on here. I also thought that the perspectives were really good, especially from the point of view of the children, very realistic. While this was rather distirbingd, it was really facinating, and an excellant piece of writing. ~cady |
| Bladez0rz 2006-07-08 ch 4, | abuseDude Awsomeness you told me about this a while ago and i just got to read it this summer Awsome truely awsome |
| Bishop Tomb 2006-07-06 ch 4, | abuseI'm a little late, but great story. Aside from that is... If your not apart of Walmart then your its enemy... Armed men will be at your door step in 5 min...Jack Bauer is Jack Bauer,... 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| Suspicious Man 2006-06-13 ch 4, | abuseI loved it. |
| Julian Tello Jr. 2006-06-01 ch 4, anon. | abuseALEX... you have done it again! how do you write so good? this story was fuckin awesome! i liked the story line because sometimes that's how i think the world would end up. i jsut never thought of it like this...alex, you are the best writer i have ever met. KEEP THE GOOD STUFF COMIN! |
| Philosophy101 2006-05-29 ch 4, | abuseDude, cool, but lay off the demented thought processes when a humanly sane person is talking. Also, the storie could have used an epilogue through one of the Wal-Mart humans that decides to overthrough the tyranny; the whole first paragraph of the epilogue I was stuck to the screen in expectation of an overthrough, or something, but the joke just ruined the ride. Other than that, excellent: you created another world, and helped to make it somewhat plausible. |
| burning in effigy 2006-05-28 ch 4, | abuseawesome :) totally interesting and the whole thing had me fascinated, and the ending made me laugh and kind of creeped out at the same time |
| firesword 2006-05-27 ch 4, | abuseAsk your mother! Amazing ending my friend! trully outstanding story. Altough it could have alittle more descibing in some parts. I FREAKING LOVE THIS! I WAS SO AWESOME! See I knew that Wal-Mart was EVIL! look what they do to us. Ask your mother... HILARIOS! |
| Aluminum Tinkerbell 2006-05-26 ch 4, | abuseAt first I was amused, but I expected the ending to be happy. Now I'm a wee bit disturbed, and afraid of my brother Wal-Mart Robosapian. Good job. |