This was a very interesting chapter, I'm hoping that you do continue with it.

I think though that you could have alittle more detail in it about certain things such as people, and surroundings. There were certain places you put a period in it where a comma could've been put, and when you had it she asked him "Isn't this what your hiring me for?" I think you meant to put "You're".

But that's it, I hope you don't take offens to it, I'd expect anybody else to do it for my works if I had mistakes.

I completely agree. I will add more detail in the next chapter. Thanks!

I like the beginning of the story: it has intrigue and a little mystery, plus some humor. There is only one thing missing: details! What does the town look like? What does the man look like? Is she a timid girl? What kind of town/city is Chanos like? There are plenty of places to elaborate and bring the reader into the story.