horray for rhyming

o, I like this a lot. Who cares if its short, I think this way it puts a little more emotion across to the reader! Nice...

Oh damn, the ending is kinda sad. Kinda really sad. Starts out all happy and stuff and throws that bomb at us. You are very deceiving you know? It's a good poem though. I like the theme. Please keep up the amazing poetry.

Ah, that's sad :(

It's really good tho. Great work.

Hazellin

PS And thanks for reviewing :)

this is really good(my favourite sofar)for a first attempt it hasan awesome flow sensation.

x3josh

This was your first attempt at a beat poem? You write like a pro! Good job can't wait to read more peoms by you

I love it. This is really good. You capture a lot of emotions about the ups and downs pf love. Great job!

that...was...totally...fricken...sweet! I love it! that was amazing! and thanks for reviewing my stuff! and this is a really good first try at a beat poem! you really wouldn't know it was your first try if you didn't read the summary!DM

omG! Your work is so amazing. The beat is perfect and the ending was great. What exactly does a "beat" poem consist of? I've never heard of that term before...Keep writing!Midnight Star

"But yet again, I’ve failed, you’ve died."

nice line. i think that you had a sort of childness to this poem...idk, maybe thats just me. its still a good poem tho.

Autumn

That's really good for a first try... actually, it's just plain good, first try or not! D Maranwe

nice. short, sweet, sad; packs a punch. i like it

It ryhms(did i spell that rite?)! i have no idea how to write rhyming peoms, if i do, they turn out funny!well, good job, it was good!:)Liz

I really liked the line "behind my mask I let them hide". Also, the rhyming worked well on this one. Keep up the good work!

Nice... so many different ideas captured in one poem!