Hey! This is really good. I really liek your writting style!

Wow...that's...amazing.

Not sure if anybody told you, but as you are editing at FictionPress's editor (after you upload) hit the shift and backspace buttons at the same time. When you first try, your two lines will join, but hold the shift button while hitting enter and another line (still double space d should form) Then, shift and backspace that line again. It might take a few tries, but it works.

Your poem was amazing, it really touched me. A lot.

A lot of the choices you made in this poem seem to either be typoes or random. "However." with a period and "Forced To live the violation," having To capitilized are distractions.

I think you would benefit a lot from playing with your diction somewhat. You use hiding in the first 2 lines and still in the last 2. That's just an example for something that goes on throughout. Using a more deliberate word choice would add a lot.

Also, "Long ago,

I was a child,

A tortured soul robbed of childhood," Those lines aren't great sonically and they don't really make sense.

I do like the ending though, and the message comes through quite clearly.

When I surf around fictionpress, I don't expect anything to touch me so profoundly as this poem did. Truly amazing. I love how you tie it up neatly in the end and don't regurgitate cliches. Nice "tip of the iceburg" theme going on...but I have to say it was easy for me to realize what you were talking about from the start since the same thing happened to me. Never stop writing poetry.

:( sad... good, but sad

Hm...an interesting thought-provoking poem. I have but one question. The punctuation at the end of every single line made the poem a bit choppy. I just thought the punctuation sometimes threw off the flow of the poem...other than that, I think that the poem was very well written and had a lot of thought put into it. I really liked the amount of feeling portrayed through your words. Great job!

very good. kind of perservereance (i cant spell) without wanting to perservere? i liked the way it was written, no need to rhyme but it still flows. very nice