|Reviews for Silence|
| iamkoold 1/17/08 . chapter 1
(In Awe) ...nice.
| SpawnMeister666 9/26/06 . chapter 1
This is an interesting piece. I like it, but I'm not sure why...
| Rayne Logan 8/20/06 . chapter 1
Wow... this is really... weird is the first word that pops into my head, but its weird in a good way. It gave me chills towards the end, but also made me think a lot...
You seem like a great writer. Keep up the great work :)
| V Shaw 6/19/06 . chapter 1
Hey there, I found the notion of a 'silent world' to be different, but also effective in conveying the main characters descent into depression - that aspect alone is incredibly thought provoking! Nice spin on the usual death/depression yarn. I also like the pacing your story, yet I'd agree with the other reviewers, and say you'd need to develop your characters more - I know, difficult thing when its a short story, but honestly thats the only nitpick I have. Overall, nice work!
| GlasgowDude 6/7/06 . chapter 1
You said you posted this a year ago, so I don't know how much you've improved as writer since, or if what I'll crit is already redundant. But having read this, it is obvious you're talented.
The story flows well and you've paced the drama nicely. But you could perhaps tighten things up a little.
Things like: "The doctors found the cancer when Brittany was twenty nine years old." - You don't really need the "years old" in there.
I liked the idea, though when you moved into absurdity with the global loss of voice, I did wake up a little. You could have gently directed the story this way. But don't ask me how, I don't have a clue. It's obvious you tried with the protagonist believing the doctor's and family's condolences were nonsense and irrelevant, but the change did wake me up.
An above reviewer said your characters are boring, and with this story, I'd have to agree with him. They are too nice. Readers nowadays don't want nice. They want to relate to a character's idiosyncrasies and personalities, and we all know man is definitely not perfect.
I did enjoy the read, but to me characters are always the vital component in fiction, and unfortunately your characters didn't derserve any empathy.
| Autumn's Last Curse 5/24/06 . chapter 1
The concept is really quite interesting, what with all vocalisations completely obliterated and the world sinking into a sort of silent depression, with the exception of a single girl. The ending was a bit disappointing though. It lacked a sort of definition that would have ended for good or a hazy end that would have given the reader time to ponder...
| Fighting Fire 5/16/06 . chapter 1
This is great writing. There is one thing that bothers me, though, and it's about your characters. They're so boring. Obviously this is a short story and you can't develop a character that well in 100 words, but really. People aren't that perfectly normal. People aren't always that perfect. I don't know quite how to explain it, but your characters are just... blah. Sorry, I thought I could explain this to you in this reveiw but now that I'm typing I can't seem to. I like your style and you obviously have talent. But this story is lacking interesting people. Readers can't relate- at least, I can't. God knows I'm not perfect.
| Look ma No hands 5/15/06 . chapter 1
*insert tears here*
I can only say... wow.