Gorgeous, just...gorgeous. It's so real I can almost feel it. I can definitely see, that's for sure. Fantastic.

Smooches-Wizzy

Nice song you have here. I liked the descriptions, they seem a little abstract, very narrative. Also the length of the poem is exact in my opinion.

I love this, mallika! particularly the following lines.."the hard banging meteorites, the nine crashing planets", "what's moving beside them, what's brushing against them". i love you, and this is really, really good. i don't think the 65% rhyme comes off though, it's a bit awkward