This could be a decent poem or two.

Delete 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 & 10; these sections are either cliched, meaningless padding, or act as fragments of other poems that seem to have been haphazardly (& clumsily) inserted into another poem (these being sections 8 & 10)..

S1:L1- bad line break.L7- remove "and cold".

The inversion ("exceedingly rare is it", "it matters not") is corny, melodramatic, & unmusical.

S9:L2- remove entirely.L8- remove entirely

The final line by itself is melodramatic & trite. Hook it to the strophe.

Can I say 'wow' without becoming a cliche?

It's strange - I really like this poem (you've got some talent here) but also I feel like I just got insulted. It's so ruff, and rude, and sassy (like - 'you' can see right through us 'society' and can rage to your hearts content while we just sit here and take it.)

I want to say that I loved it; but that might be somewhat of an aspersion to someone like you.

Juliet.